I will follow you into the dark

You'll always be my best friend

Thursday, March 31, 2011

"Sometimes in life there really are bonds formed that can never be broken. Sometimes you really can find that one person who will stand by you no matter what; maybe you’ll find it in a spouse and celebrate it with your dream wedding, but there is also the chance that the one person you can count on for a lifetime, the one person who knows you, sometimes better than you know yourself, is the same person who's been standing beside you all along."

Dear Jerri,

I was watching Bride Wars today (cue your eye roll) and this was the quote that I heard at the end of it all and the first person I thought of was you!

Jerri, thanks for the lazy days at home we've spent together, experimenting on each other's faces, thank you for the innumerable shopping trips, for all the starbucks, and for that tub of burnt caramel, for those cupcakes you gave me the first time I came to your house, and your support on everything I do. I know you're the one person who'd always want the best for me, and I appreciate you a lot for that. Its really such a shame that we didn't become good friends when we were still in school, but maybe it was for the best. Our friendship was something that the walls of St. Margarets just wasn't meant to see (it never was a conducive place for friendships anyways), but i'm so glad that we met up after graduation and became such amazing friends. I know we're gonna have like 50 billion years more of amazing friendshipness together. (We'll be the crazy grandma's in the nursing home doing wheelchair races) I cannot WAIT to see you on Saturday at the match!

I love you more than a fat kid loves cake and more than I love The Beatles!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Beee :D

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Love was a promise made of smoke
In a frozen copse of trees
A bone cold and older than our bodies
Slowly floating in the sea
Every morning there were planes
The shiny blades of pagan angels in our father's skies
Every evening I would watch her hold the pillow
Tight against her hollows, her unholy child
I was still a beggar shaking out my stolen coat
Among the angry cemetery leaves
When they caught the king beneath the borrowed car
Righteous, drunk, and fumbling for the royal keys

Love was a father's flag and sung like a shank
In a cake on our leather boots
A beautiful feather floating down
To where the birds had shit on empty chapel pews
Every morning we found one more machine
To mock our ever waning patience at the well
Every evening she'd descend the mountain stealing socks
And singing something good where all the horses fell
Like a snake within the wilted garden wall
I�d hint to her every possibility
While with his gun the pagan angel rose to say
"My love is one made to break every bended knee"

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Is it ok if I don't come around?

Reality is the name we give to our disappointments

Maybe to everyone who cancelled on me, it wasn't such a big deal. Maybe to them i'm overreacting, maybe they think that i'm over sensitive, but you know what? I'm not. Not to me at least.

To me, today meant a lot. The thought of today was literally what got me through this otherwise terrible week - the thought that saturday would be the best day yet. Instead, it was probably the worse. I'm pretty sure I hit a new kind of low today.

Out of the 5 people who told me they'd make it for sure, not one bothered to show up. Not even one. And none of you know or will ever know how bad it felt when that last one cancelled on me. Its really tiring to have hopes you know? You invest so much energy and love and care and concern into it, and then nothing comes out of it. Today was pretty much the last day I was gonna go out, so to everyone who said they'd make it up to me? To everyone who thought I'd be ok, i'm not. To everyone who thinks i'm overreacting, I am.

Thanks so much for the most amazing saturday yet guys. I appreciated it.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Sad words are just another beauty. A sad story means, this storyteller is alive. The next thing you know, something fine will happen to her, something marvelous, and then she will turn around and smile.

Whats this about? I figured love would shine through, we've lost romance, this world has turned so see through

I want to write something beautiful, but I just have no inspiration ):

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Hollie Ollie Oxen Free,

Won't you run away with me?

Sunday, March 20, 2011

There are other fish in the sea, and they love each other. Never me.

HOLI HAIIIIII

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Its Holi! The celebration of colors that marks the change of winter into spring, the season of love! I wish I was in India to celebrate this, with the streets absolutely FILLED with colors and scented water. Have a great day, don't waste it! Its the first day of the season of love :)

Well all the days feel the same, don't feel the cold or wind or rain.

Luna

h

Tonight, the world is going on and on about the big, beautiful, romantic moon. Apparently its 10% bigger and 20% brighter. So how bout some moon legends?

I kinda love how different cultures have perceived the moon in different ways. The greek' s had two different goddesses for the moon. One showed the moon as some sort of a spooky goddess who had three heads - a dog, a horse and a snake. They left her sacrifices in grave yards and three pronged roads. They took her to be evil. Whereas Selene is a glamorous, romantic, sensual woman who rides across the sky to meet her sister, who is the goddess of the dawn.

The Incan's took the moon goddess to protect women, marriage and the menstrual cycle. They believed that animals came after her, and on the perpetual night, they got her and in order to scare them away, the made noise with drums and with their voices.

The Mesopotamians believed that the moon god was the father of all, not the sun god, as in many other religions. He was the single most important god of their religion.

The Egyptians had Thoth, the god of the moon and education. He was the scribe of the gods and was responsible to taking into account the number of souls that depart into the after life. Not only that, he was the creator of science, art and the master of magic.

The Aztec moon goddess is the one of lust and sex, whereas the Japanese goddess of the sun was once the goddess of the moon, but after being unable to look down at all the adultery that happened at night, she begged her brother to change places with her.

The point i'm trying to make is, everyone looks at the same moon, be it 5000 years ago or now, and everyone thinks of something vastly different. Whilst you sit there and think about how much you love her, someone else is staring at the moon thinking about magic, or sex, or even the menstrual cycle!

Everyone is talking about how huge, gorgeous, bright and fucking romantic the moon is looking tonight and I can't fucking see it. Why does it always have to be me? ):

And then I see you, with commets tangled up in your hair and stars in your eyes, I have to catch my breath. I come up with so many magical words that I could bewitch you with (of course, yours are far better, but if only they were meant for me) but when it comes down to the actual talking, I falter. Its those damn stars in your eyes, I can't speak, can't move, can't even breathe when they're staring at me. I can feel the chocolate of your eyes slipping past my shoulders, drawing me in, pulling me closer, slowly, silently incapacitating me.

The least you could do is uncross your heart. Unhope to die.

Kings Horses

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Jokers believe what they're told more or less
So pull up an armchair lets drink to success
Everyone laughed at the things that you said
At all the kings horses and all the kings men

When the back lights have broken
Then all that you built will come tumbling down
Don't try to hold it
You know you can always start over again

Tell me a story or sing me a tune
Remember the one 'bout the man on the moon?
In the morning i swear i will tell you the truth
How you receive it, well, that's up to you

When the back lights have broken
Then all that you built will come tumbling down
Don't try to hold it
You know you can always start over again

I know i should ask you
But everyone got scared
I just want to help you
But everyone got scared

I should have told you
That everyone knows what they wished they had said

Now the back lights have broken
And all that you built has come tumbling down
So don't try to hold it
You know you can always start over again

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

“Tomorrow, and tomorrow and tomorrow
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusted death. Out, out, brief candle,
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a take
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury
Signidying nothing.”

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Three things I really wanna buy which Jerrica will probably kill me for:

1) Boi-ing concealer from Benefit

2) Mac Face and Body Foundation

3) Mac Mineralize Skin Finish Natural

:D :D :D

Friday, March 11, 2011

You won't ever understand how I feel when I listen to The Beatles. Never.

ॐ

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain
Don't carry the world upon your shoulders
For well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder
Na na na, na na, na na na na

So let it out and let it in, hey Jude, begin
You're waiting for someone to perform with
And don't you know that it's just you? Hey Jude, you'll do
The movement you need is on your shoulder
Na na na, na na, na na na na, yeah

Thank you Paul, thank you so much :) You always have a song for me, always.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Crying occurs when the body reacts emotionally to something. Tears are a reaction of the nervous system to try and ease our pain, just as we would when physically harmed. The body senses our distress and the cranial nerve in the brain is stimulated, this sends signals to the neurotransmitters in the tear glands to make us cry. These tears contain high levels of manganese and the hormone prolactin in order to reduce the amount of these chemicals in the body, a defence mechanism produced to keep depression away. This is why many people feel better after they cry, because these excess hormones have been reduced and the body is returned to a more stable state.

Sometimes we say we can’t cry anymore. Why? Well, if you keep triggering a stimulus, the nervous system stops responding. If you keep pressing on a bruise, after a while the nerves won’t respond anymore and it won’t hurt. If you keep getting upset, the body might not react to it, you might not cry, and you probably feel worse.

So if you need to cry, just do it. It might be distressing, it might make you feel weak, it might make your eyes puffy, but it also might make you feel better.

I caught myself thinking about you today, its been over a year and a half since I last talked to you, and probably a year since I last thought about you. Its hard to believe we used to talk almost all day once upon a time. Its hard to believe that you used to skip school to talk to me longer, that I used to give up sleep to spend more time listening your voice. Its hard to believe that you told me things you never told anyone else, its hard to believe that I did too. It was painfully obvious that I liked you, it was obvious that you liked me too (which I found hard to believe btw, you had so many, much prettier girls after you)You were one of the better memories of that year, I must say. Going to India and being uncontactable for a month really did in our friendship, didn't it? I wish it hadn't happened. I wish we hadn't become strangers. Wouldn't it have been perfect if we didn't let our prides get in the way? Dare I say, I would've met you when I was in your home town in Canada, you would've probably come to see me too. But now we've lost all contact, its too late. I suppose I won't forget you, though I admit, i'd really like to. Its torturous to remember.

EVERYBODY knows that when I move to UK, the apartment/ house I will live in will be heavily beatle-ized. I want to have a huge framed poster of The Beatles hanging in the living room, and after much research, i've decided it'll probably be this one -

gorgeous, ain't it?

Secondly, I want a mural in my bed room. Originally, I wanted a tree with strawberry's on it and the lyrics,' no one I think is in my tree, I mean it must be high or low' printed next to it. However, now i'm thinking about,' The sun is up, the sky is blue, its beautiful, and so are you' running along the top's of all the four walls. Or maybe even ,' And all the broken hearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be' or perhaps,'One day, you'll look, to see i've gone, but tomorrow may rain so, i'll follow the sun.' There are so many more songs I could use! Blackbird, Here Comes The Sun, All Things Must Pass. Its all so confusing ):

I wish i could have them all up in some way! But it'd look very cluttered wouldn't it? Another thing i was thinking of doing is getting different lyrics framed in simple black frames and have them in different places around the house, because the beatles always have answers for me. Always. And that way, i'd be able to find the answers when I need them. Idk though, I probably won't do that. Its all so confusing! D:

Why don't we do it in the road?

Friday, March 4, 2011

So much love for this song omg

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Everybody knows that something's wrong, but nobody know's whats going on. We all sing the same old song, when you want it all to go away, its shaping up to be a lonely day.

This is just a big ball of horrible.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Why are moths drawn to a flame? Are they truly unable to tell that the light they so desire is burning them alive? Or are they the only creatures brave enough to embrace the truth that death is the only goal worth pursuing in life?

I wanna hold your hand

To our and future generations, because there will always be poverty and pain and war and injustice in this world. But there will, thank the lord, also always be, The Beatles