Ever since I was a child, I’ve lived in the jaded world of fairytales, my feet hardly ever touched the ground, and that was how I liked it. I had decided early on that I was not a creature meant for the harsh realities of this world, that the clouds were my homeland and that was where I had to stay, far away from the anguish, suffering, humiliation and deceit of the real world. And so, I waited every night at midnight by the window for Peter Pan to come whisk me away with him to Never Never Land. I went to every wedding with the satisfaction that I had witnessed a ‘happily ever after’. I drowned in the realm of literature when the real world was too much for me. This is how I’ve grown up, and it is because of this mentality that I am the way I am. As a 17 year old teenager on the brink of becoming an adult, I still believe in fairytales the same way I did when I was 6.

You might think that this is a bad thing, you might think that I’m living in ignorance of the pain that awaits me. Let me tell you something, ignorance is bliss, and blissful I will be. Not to say I’m disconnected to with the sorrows of the world, I keep myself updated and knowledgeable at all times, after all, something must die in order for something better to take its place. And its not like I haven’t been given ample reasons to stop believing. I’ve seen marriages shatter into pieces. I’ve seen abusive, cheating, husbands and I’ve seen alcoholic, unhappy wives. I’ve seen the pain of the fallacy of a forced marriage, I’ve seen the struggle to make ends meet. I’ve seen the demise of a man truly evil as many a times as I’ve seen the demise of a man with a heart of gold. I’ve seen a son suddenly left fatherless and I’ve seen babies given up for adoption. I’ve seen my share, more than my share.

I just like my beliefs or illusions, facades, bullshit as many people have called it. I’m not ready to let go, I’m going to continue to believe that in the end, everything will be perfect, that even if things look like they’re in dishevels, I’ll be happy, or at least content with what I have, with who I have.